Accidental transvestite

My main problem with clothes shopping, is the fear of becoming an accidental transvestite. Well ok, so i am using slightly the wrong term here but hey-If i cared i'd change it. The problem is, I don't have much dress sense. This might shock all of my closest friends, who have witnessed first hand my amazing co-ordination of colours and fantasticly fashionable attire. However it is true. I can cope with Burtons, or Next, most of the time. The problem arises with those shops who sell guys clothes...next to girls clothes. How does one tell the difference??

Obviously the mini skirt and lingerie section are easily distuingishable, but when we get down to the finer points such as jackets, jeans and shorts, how is one to know? Everytime i walk in to such a shop, i look around desperately for some assurance , on signs and boards, even in the clothes themselves, but sometimes the clothes themselves don't say. So if you see me walking round in what appears to be girls clothes, just give me a gentle nudge and a whisper in the ear and that would be much appreciated.

Toilets are great. You'd be hard pushed to beat a cubicle in the corner of a public loo. Ok so they smell bad, and the floor is often littered with all kinds of indescribable things, however i have to admit i have grown to love the humble cubicle. Why? Because it offers me a few minutes of pure alone time. Its like shrinking back into my brain for 5 mins. No-one else around, completely alone with your thoughts and your own space. Step out of the world and into the calm and serenity of four walls and just you inside (hopefully!?!). I may be odd, but i tend to enjoy being on my own, and going to the toilet gives me a 3 minute break to recover before re-entering the world. Urinals just aren't the same